Swing Shift Volume 13- Pictures, Codewords, and Blowjobs

This weeks questions come from a new reader who just found my blog a few weeks ago.  She wishes to remain anonymous, and I don’t even know if she has a blog of her own, so we’ll all just have to wonder who she is.  She and her hubby are thinking about getting into the lifestyle and had several questions for us:

Whats up with guys photos?  How come many couples don’t show the guy?  We put a few pics of both of us.  Should we do more of her?  Keep it even?  None of him?  Is it the allure of her, so people will then contact you, and have to ask for his?

And meeting another couple for the first time -  if you meet in public for say dinner or drinks.  Are you going dutch?  Offer to pay?

And if at dinner you really like a couple – do you have a signal you give each other that you each like the couple, so your ready to go farther?  Or do you not do anything on the first meet up?  We were thinking of some kind of sign so we didn’t need to go off together and talk about it.  kwim?  What do you and Veronica do?

Ok  and I think our last question.  What about blow jobs?  Condoms on? off?  depends?  if so …. I guess the non latex?

We think pictures are extremely important.  We’ve stated numerous times that for us swinging is really just sport-fucking and freely admit to only wanting to fuck good looking people.  After all, we like to think that we’re at least half-decent looking ourselves.

Veronica:  I like to see pictures of both the guy and the girl.  I think more profiles are skewed towards female photos, because men are usually the ones surfing the profiles.  This of course is not based on hard scientific fact, but rather the anecdotal evidence from chatting with couples.  For me, the whole process is kind of like shopping.  First I will check out the pictures of the girl, if I feel they match up with what Hubman likes (and I am rarely wrong), I then look at the pictures of the guy, if I like the guy, then I carefully read the profile.  I cannot emphasize enough the importance of reading the profile carefully.  If the profile is a match, I then call Hubman over for a consultation and if he agrees with my assessment, then I send the email.  (Want to know my opinion on crafting a good email?  Just ask.)   I also agree on the having sex with attractive people.  I am married to a very good looking man, I want to have sex with people that are at least as attractive (and well-endowed) as Hubman is.

To us, an ideal profile is one that shows several pictures of the woman and of the man.  Clothed is fine, we just like to see enough to know if they have good bodies and take care of themselves or not.  Some nekkidness is always good, but certainly not necessary.  Our Swappernet public picture gallery has 5 pictures.  There are 3 of Veronica, including the one at the left which is our main profile picture.  There is also another picture of her ass and one of her tits and upper body.  There are two of me, one from the front, partly dressed [remember my old Blogger avatar of me laying on the bed in a pair of black Calvins? That one] and one of me nekkid from behind.  Because I think Veronica isn’t the only one in the house with a nice ass *wink*

I’m immediately skeptical, and I’m not sure why, of the profile with a dozen pictures or more of her and none of him.  Something is up with that.  We certainly don’t expect to see a face picture in someone’s public gallery, as we don’t have one.  But you should either have face pictures in your private photo gallery or be willing to share one via e-mail before meeting for the first time.  We learned that lesson the hard way…  Our private gallery has more pictures, including two face pics of us together, plus pictures of Veronica sucking my cock and a full frontal nekkid [but not aroused] picture of me.  What we don’t have are any ridiculous close-ups of her pussy or of my cock.  I guess what we go for is sexy and revealing, but still tasteful.

Veronica: I like a tasteful picture.  I am not a big fan of cock shots.  One, I want to know about the whole package, not just the one in your pants and two, unless you have a cock that is large enough to need its own  zip code, I can’t gauge size if you are talented with camera angles unless you’ve got your manhood next to a ruler.  I also do not like gynecological  textbook quality shots of the ladies.  If I am going to see your pussy that close up, I want to have my tongue out and ready for action.

Meeting a couple for the first time, our preference and what we’ve always done is to meet for dinner and drinks somewhere.  That’s a good no-pressure way to meet and allows see if there is chemistry between us [because it's not ALL about looks!].  We’ve always gone Dutch on the check and never considered offering to pick up the whole tab, to tell you the truth.  If we were meeting a single individual, it might be different, but 2 couples, we’re just splitting the check.

Which brings us to our anonymous readers next question.  As a general rule, we don’t play on a first date.  We have before, and don’t regret doing so, but those are exceptions, and we let the couple we’re going to see for the first time know that before the date [keep in mind that there is nothing really unusual about our approach to first dates, as most of the couples we've known do the exact same thing].

We go on the date assuming that we’ll like the couple and will want to see them again.  Don’t forget, by this time we’ve seen pictures and chatted on the phone, so there is some connection already.  But, if it goes sour in person, Veronica and I have a code phrase.  If either of us utters the code phrase, that clearly communicates “in no way do I want to see these people again”.  If Veronica uses it, no matter how hot the woman is and how good of a connection she and I have, we won’t be getting nekkid together.  We DO NOT take one for the team- we’re both into the couple or not.  No “I’ll fuck her because she really wants to fuck him” for us.  That is one of our unbreakable rules.  Click here for a recent Swing Shift post about the pitfalls of not insisting on seeing their faces ahead of time, which is also a good example of time one of us invoked the code phrase.

Veronica:  If you take no other piece of advice away from Swing Shift, please make it the ‘no taking one for the team’ rule.  It can only lead to resentment and issues.

Lastly, about safe sex- don’t ask us.  Seriously, safe sex decisions are between you and your primary partner.  Long before Veronica and I ever fucked anyone else, we talked over various scenarios and decided what we’re comfortable with.  Rather than repeat what I’ve written before, I’d like to direct you to this post from last winter, which spells out our thoughts quite clearly, I think.  And I’d encourage you to read the comments on that post as well, as there was quite a good discussion.  There was also a short follow-up post here.

On a somewhat related note, Kimberly aka The Errant Wife wrote a great post about sex bloggers and condoms.  Click here to read it, if you haven’t already done so.

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Thanks to my anonymous reader for some great questions! I’m looking forward to any comments people leave today.  As always, feel free to leave additional questions in the comments section or e-mail me at hubman38 at gmail dot com if you’d prefer to remain anonymous.

Darling Boy are traveling home from Washington DC Monday, so I’ll respond to your comments when I get home later.  I also hope to write about the rest of the trip and share some more pictures of the sights and hopefully I’ll have that for Tuesday.

Oh, I almost forgot!!!  DB and I meet a blogger friend and her son for dinner on Sunday, the lovely April of April’s Random Showers!  She is even cooler [and better looking, if that's possible] in person, and she said she’s gonna write a post about our meeting.  I’ll be sure to link to it when she does!

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