Paging Dr Hubman

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Apr 132011
 

What is it with family?  You’re kinda-sorta an expert in something and they think you know it all. Anyone who knows me knows for damn sure that I don’t know it all, much less part of it all!

So I’ve earned my Ph.D. in a field related to medicine, but not IN medicine, I have ZERO clinical skills. Even though I’ve been working in this area for many years and have talked at length about the work that I do with my family, I still get the most inappropriate questions. Two recent instances reminded me of this.

First, my dad has been having trouble with his knees. He proceeds to describe to me the pain he’s been feeling, when it occurs, what aggravates it and so on. It’s like he thinks I’m an orthopedic surgeon!

“So what do you think it might be?”

“Dad, I don’t have a clue”

“Really? I thought you knew about this sort of thing”

“Why, because I had an anatomy class 20 years ago? Have you been paying attention when we’ve talked about my work for the past 10 years?”

Fortunately he did see an orthopedist, got some physical therapy and his knees are feeling a little better, at least as good as 67 yr old knees can feel.

Last week Veronica’s mom, who I love dearly, e-mailed Veronica with her latest medical issues. Among the issues was something abnormal appearing with her lungs that showed up on an abdominal x-ray.

Am I a radiologist? No

Am I a pulmonologist? No

Did that stop Veronica’s mom from asking for my opinion of what the doctor saw? Of course not!

Oh yeah, I should mention that she was asking me because it was her gynecologist who wanted the x-ray and told her to follow-up for her regular doc. She couldn’t wait until she actually got to see her doc, so she turned to me, as if I have a freakin’ clue…

I can’t be the only one this happens too, right? At the very least there have to be some IT types who are bugged by family- you know computers so of course you know every piece of software out there, right?

Mar 302011
 

A daughter may outgrow your lap, but she will never outgrow your heart ~Author Unknown

The way Veronica and I debated back and forth over whether to have a second child or not, in retrospect, was seemingly endless. We had already decided to wait several years after DB was born, since I started a full-time Ph.D. program when he was 3 years old. Before I even knew where I would be going to school Veronica and I had already decided that there was no way we could handle having an infant in the house while I was taking a full-time course load, but once my comprehensive exam was behind me it would be a different story. As my 3rd year and that comprehensive exam was approaching, we finally decided that yes, we did want a second child.

We had fun announcing Veronica’s pregnancy to the family. They were all gathered at our house for DB’s 5th birthday and we coached him to make an announced for us. We got everyone’s attention and right on cue DB declared “there’s a baby in mommy’s tummy.”  And there was much rejoicing :-)

A month or so later I told my mentor that Veronica was pregnant and that I was really hoping to have my comprehensive exam completed before the baby arrived. He asked what her due date was and after I told him, he paused for a moment then said “yeah, I don’t see any problem with that.”  Thank goodness!

Five years ago today Veronica woke up and said “I think it’s time!” and several hours later our wonderful little girl was born. As with DB our life hasn’t been the same since, and I couldn’t be happier.

Happy Birthday Princess Persistent!


Dad Time

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Dec 202010
 

There has been quite a bit of dad time this weekend!

First, my dad and his longtime girlfriend came up to visit, arriving on Saturday afternoon, for an early Christmas celebration.  For a variety of reasons, mostly due to distance, we haven’t spent a Christmas day together in almost 20 years (he and my mom divorced 24 yrs ago, when I was 16), but we always find time close to Christmas to exchange gifts and spend some time together.  Unfortunately, his GF came with him.  She’s not a bad person, just a very simple one, and not much of conversationalist at all.  We told them “DB is spending the week after Christmas in Pittsburgh with my mom” and she replied “Oh, he’s going to Pittsburgh? For how long?”  Every exchange is like that, she repeats what you say in a way that implies she didn’t understand even the simplest of statements.

It’s more than that though.  While she will travel with my dad, you always get the impression she’d rather be at home.  When just my dad comes to visit, he’ll sleep here on the futon downstairs.  With her, they’ll stay at a local hotel, because that’s what she prefers.  Not only that, but they returned to the hotel around 8pm, then came back to the house around 10am to visit for another hour or so before heading back to NY.  That’s hours of time my dad missed with his grandkids.  I may joke and gripe about his presence inhibiting my online time, but in the end I’d rather he had the time with the kids.

Oh, a funny story I have to share!

If you were to pick up my Mac and open iPhoto, you wouldn’t find a single naked picture of me or anyone else in there.  I’m very careful to segregate the family-friendly from the not-so-family-friendly pictures.  Or so I thought…

I was showing him pictures from my trip to Orlando several weeks ago and there was not one but two suggestive pictures, my HNT from that week and the click-thru!  I quickly clicked past them and mumbled something about special treats for Veronica while I was away.  Then there were a few pictures from when I had dinner at Ivey Lane’s house.  That was easier, I just said she was an old friend of ours and he didn’t question it.  Whew, that was close!

After my dad and his gf left late Sunday morning (she couldn’t wait to get back home to sit around and do nothing), I had even more Dad time.  Earlier that morning Veronica left for a little overnight trip to NYC, just like she did around this time last year.  We were talking gift ideas several weeks ago and she mentioned that what  she really wanted was to repeat that trip, and I was more than happy to watch the kids while she visited the Big Apple.

The kids and I declared Sunday a pajama day and we spent the day inside. They had free reign to make a mess of the living room, we ordered pizza for dinner and generally had a great time hanging out together.  As much as Veronica is enjoying the city, I’m having just as much fun with the kids!

Though I am ready for her to come home Monday evening…

 

Okay, not literally everyone, Veronica and I have more than a few readers and our house isn’t that big!

On the day after Thanksgiving last year, in response to a number of people expressing displeasure with their Thanksgiving Day plans, or lack thereof, we wrote the following:

Here are the Top 9 Reasons to attend Blogger-Giving at Hubman and Veronica’s

  1. An awesome (adult only) group HNT of everyone’s butts.
  2. A  lovely breakfast on Thursday with the Macy’s parade on TV
  3. A full Thanksgiving dinner (perhaps we can do it Italian style and even have ravioli)
  4. Football!  Football!  Football!
  5. Lots of Booze.
  6. Veronica insisting that we all crash at whatever guests are staying at the local Holiday Inn Express so we can swim off dinner in the pool.
  7. On Friday, a road trip to Plymouth Rock to see the replica of the Mayflower and enjoy the history.
  8. Lots of food, fun, and friendly conversation with people who do not know every button to push or any magical phrases to make you feel guilty.
  9. For those who have kids, hopefully there will be tons of kids around so they will all play with each other and not bug the parents.  Then if the weather’s nice we can have the kiddie table outside!

Did you think we were kidding?  We’re not!

Have either of us met you?  Have we ever spoken on the phone?  Do we know your real name?  Then you’re invited!  If you can’t answer yes but think we’d enjoy the pleasure of your company anyway, let us know and we’ll see.

So who’s in?

Sep 262010
 

In some way, it hardly feels like I was gone for 10 weeks.  While Veronica had shared some concerns about an adjustment period when I returned, we settled right back into a normal routine pretty easily.  The kids are used to having more than 1 parent to harass, Veronica is back into her normal routine of going to the gym several times a week and having someone to share in the parenting duties, and believe it or not, we even managed to resume our normal sex life right away ;-)

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There have been some odd things though, mostly at work.  Before I left I set the Outlook out-of-office assistant to notify anyone who emailed me where I would be and how long I would be gone.  I have a dry-erase board on the outside of my office door and left a message there as well,  again with where I would be and how long I would be gone.

I swear, some of my co-workers embody the absent-minded professor stereotype!  At least 4 or 5 of them said something along the lines of “hey, haven’t seen you in a while, have you been away?” or “long time no see, what have you been doing?”

Really?

I do have to admit, those people were a distinct minority, most people realized exactly where I was and what I was doing there and wanted to hear all about my time in Texas.  Of course, I couldn’t tell them everything, they don’t need to know about some of my various adventures!

One saving grace was that my boss was on vacation all week.  I really like my boss and he’s been instrumental in my professional development, but I just know he would have driven me nuts this week with pushing me to re-engage with projects I left idle while I was gone.  Without him around I could ease myself back into work, dealing with e-mails, catching up the status of some stuff c0-workers were taking care of for me, etc.

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Starting last January I had been seeing a chiropractor for my back, it seemed like my lower back was always bothering me, even first thing in the morning.  The chiropractor definitely helped, but the pain never fully went away.  I felt like the chiropractor was doing a good job, but there were limits to what he could do for me, so I learned to cope with the occasional really sore back.

Whenever I traveled throughout the spring, it seemed like my back was better when I was gone.  I didn’t think too much about it until I got to Texas and my back didn’t bother me all summer.

The culprit?  Our mattress.

In the spring of 2009 we replaced the mattress that we bought sometime in the late ’90s with one of those fancy memory-foam types.  It’s nice and comfy and apparently not supportive enough for me.  As soon as I returned home my lower back issues returned.  Veronica and I will be going mattress shopping sometime this week…

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Sunday morning DB and I will be in Boston for a bike ride, the Hub on Wheels event starting at City Hall Plaza.  Several years ago he and I did a 10 mile ride together, but that was when I was still pulling him on his trailer bike.  This time, he’s on his own, riding alongside me.  I hope he enjoys it as much as I will!  I’ll be carrying my SLR in a backpack, so be prepared for pictures tomorrow!

Sep 062010
 

The longer I’m away from home, the more I miss some things.  The other day Veronica commented that she misses the simple pleasure of sleeping next to me, listening to me breath and feeling my hand resting somewhere on her body.  It passed after a few minutes, and it certainly wasn’t her intention, but that little comment evoked a deep feeling of sadness that I really didn’t expect.

Yesterday MsTigerX texted me some pictures of the view from her porch, overlooking the yard.  Next thing I know, I’m thinking about my deck at home and the simple pleasure of sitting out back, watching with kids play in the yard.

In no particular order, other things I’m missing
- laying out on the hammock in the evening (see that header image above? You get the idea)
- tucking my kids into bed at night
- random acts of affection with Veronica throughout the day
- when my daughter climbs onto my lap for snuggles for no apparent reason
- date night with Veronica
- bike rides with my son
- taking the dog for a walk around the block with the kids
- feeling Veronica’s, well, everything
- home cooking
- our evening routine, kids in bed, Veronica and I relaxing together, finishing off the day with quality naked time
- and so much else.

8 more days and I’m on the road, 11 more days and I’m walking in the front door and into the arms of my family.

And there’s this too ;-)

Aug 222010
 

I’m laying here in a hotel room bed in Dallas, TX with Veronica sleeping peacefully by my side, and I think back to this day 17 years ago, when I stood at the alter of the church I grew up in and watched her walk down the aisle to join me at my side.

And she’s been there ever since.

I look back over the journey that we’ve shared so far (she’s been with me for half of my 40 yrs!) and I couldn’t imagine it any other way.  Sure, we’ve have our ups and downs, just like any other couple, but at the end of the day, my life is better because she’s a part of it.

She is my wife, my best friend, my lover, my confidant, my everything.

Happy Anniversary Veronica, I love you now more than ever!

Aug 072010
 

Today is my little man’s birthday, it’s hard to believe that he’s been a part of our lives for 10 years already!

Yeah, I’m biased but I think he’s the bestest kid a dad could ever wish for and I can’t imagine my life without him.

Happy Birthday son, I hope you have a wonderful day!

Jun 202010
 

To all my fellow dads, I hope you have a Happy Father’s Day!

Apparently Veronica managed to find a few nice things to say about me, go visit her blog if you’re interested…

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We’re heading off on a family vacation early Sunday morning, returning Friday night.  Today we’ll be visiting the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, NY, then we’re off to visit our undergraduate school, where we meet almost 20 yrs ago and haven’t been back to in 13 yrs.  We fully intend in making the kids sick with all of our reminiscing!  After that we’ll continue west to the Pittsburgh area, where we’ll spend several days with my mom and step-dad before returning home.

Father’s Day seems like as good a time as any to re-publish one of my favorite pics of me and the kids, from last summer…

Jan 242010
 

I don’t care what she says, today is NOT my 40th birthday!

It’s the first anniversary of my 39th birthday.  That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it!

Okay, fine, it really is my 40th birthday today.  Veronica has a list of 40 things she loves about me on her blog today.  She must have thought long and hard [just how she likes it, hehe] to find 40 nice things to say about me…

Anyone wants to help me feel better about my entry into middle age, I’d suggest sending me nekkid pictures.  Preferably of boobies :-)

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