How we got here, part 2

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Feb 202012
 

For part 1, you have to turn the way-back machine to January 3, 2009. I started blogging in September of 2008, with the original Hubman’s Hangout hosted on Blogger.  Around that same time, a series of events lead Veronica to open our marriage and experiment with swinging after 18 years of monogamy.  I deleted that original blog after a few months because I felt I was careless and over-shared some personal details about my life and more importantly, about my work. Veronica and I wrote “How we got here” to recap the path we took from 18 years of monogamy to experimenting with and enjoying the swinging lifestyle.

A common question we get from new online friends is “how did you and Veronica decide to have an open marriage?” and I often direct people to that post. However, that only tells part of the story, because up until that time everything we had done was as a couple, there was never any thought of us playing separately.

There are bits and pieces of the story scattered throughout the last 3 years of this blog, so think of this as the Reader’s Digest condensed version of the story.

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I’ve had several opportunities to meet blogging friends during the course of my travels for work. Throughout the spring and summer of 2009 an online friend in the south and I were becoming pretty good friends (and we still are, in fact, I was in touch with her just last week). I knew that she was married but unhappy with her complete lack of a sex life and that she had some extra-marital partners in the past. As we got to know each other better, the sexual chemistry between us became increasingly obvious and we talked about meeting up someday, which was possible because I had an on-going project at a work site in her area.

Veronica knew all about my chats with this woman and I talked with her about possibly taking a little time during a trip to see her. This would, and at the same time would not be, something new. Another online friend of ours was Southern Vixen, whom we’ve written about numerous times (her blog is gone, so no links). Veronica, SoVix and I had a long weekend together in Miami (link to one of my mostest favorite HNT posts) in January 2009, and that spring and early summer I saw SoVix alone a couple of times.  Veronica was comfortable with me seeing SoVix alone, because she was her friend too, this wasn’t a relative stranger to her.

In September 2009 I added a personal day to a trip to my friends area and we spent 4 memorable hours trying to fuck each others brains out. It was fantastic! Oh, I just realized, those rotating header images you see at the top of this page? She took one of those that day :-)

A day or two later, my friend emailed Veronica, to thank her for sharing me with her and to say what a great time she had with me.

Veronica LOVED it, she (unexpectedly, I think) found herself getting turned on by her husband satisfying another woman.

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Over the course of the next year, I had the opportunity to meet and play with some other online friends, one relatively local and some others who lived in areas I was traveling to for work. February of 2010 found us in another new situation, I was making a trip for the sole purpose of meeting a friend I knew through twitter. I was going to join her and her husband for their first MFM experience, in fact this would be their first experience having anyone join them in bed.

As an aside, a recent conversation with another friend reminded me of the difference between perception and reality. She suspected that I often traveled to meet up with online friends. The reality is, I’ve made a solo overnight trip just 5 times in the last 2+ years, when the sole purpose of that trip was to spent time with a friend.

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In the summer of 2010 I had to go away for work for 10 weeks. With the experiences and adventures of the last year in mind, Veronica and I decided that we’d each have the freedom to purpose other partners while we were apart, without the usual obligation of keeping each other informed of what was going on, at least not right away. I set up a profile on AFF and met a couple of women, I was very up front about being in an open marriage and having the freedom to play while Veronica and I were apart.

A favorite story, featured as the Wanton Wednesday post It started with a tweet, happened at the end of that trip :-)

That time apart set the stage for my creating an Ashley Madison profile in January 2011, which of course led to my year-long relationship with Katie.

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Veronica continued, and still continues, to get turned on by my playing with others, without her involvement.

So what about her, why doesn’t she play alone you ask?  If she wanted too, she absolutely could, I would welcome it if she decided that she wanted to give being a hotwife a try. While I was away for 10 weeks, she was simply too busy/tired/stressed/etc being a single mom to 2 kids and working full time, so she didn’t bother.

Veronica describes herself as “flypaper for freaks”, if there’s an oddball character out there, they’ll find her. She enjoys watching procedural and crime dramas (trivia time- “Veronica” is an alias, she created it when she was active on a website about the TV show Criminal Minds and kept using the name when she started blogging).  Couple those 2 facts together, and she’s very reluctant to go out on her own and see someone that she met online.

It’s an admittedly unconventional arrangement, but it works for us.

Will there ever be a part 3 to this tale? Only time will tell.

[I wrote this while Veronica is in NY with the kids, visiting family. She may add her own $0.02 once she returns later today]

 Open Marriage  3 Responses »

Dinner with Katie

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Jan 262012
 

Yes, the same Katie I broke up with last September, after a 7 month relationship…

Back in November I casually mentioned that I missed fucking her. I didn’t contact her at the time, though I continued to thinking about her.

The holidays rolled around and since it had been a while, I figured it should be safe to send her a “Merry Christmas and Happy New Year” text message. Within minutes she replied, clearly happy to hear from me. We exchanged pleasantries for a bit and talked about staying in touch.

A couple of weeks later, we’re texting again and I mentioned that I saw a woman at the gym that reminded me of her, and that I still think of her sometimes.  Her response? “I am sure it is my ass you think about! lol”  The conversation stays in the gutter from there, and we end up talking about getting together again, for lunch or dinner sometime.

A week later, she’s giving me a hug and a kiss when we meet for dinner at a local restaurant.  Dinner was good, it was nice to chat with her, she looks as good as ever and clearly she’s gotten over any hurt I caused when I ended things with her.  We talked about getting together again, but didn’t make any plans.

The other day she texts to wish me a happy birthday and reaffirm that she’d like to see me again.  Just to be sure I was perfectly clear of her intentions, she also said “I cannot wait to fuck you! I just want to bury my face between your legs, I’m sick of dreaming about it. Please give me your schedule and I’ll work around it”

Seems I may be fucking her again, sooner rather than later

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For those of you thinking of her and her emotional well-being, I haven’t forgotten that I ended things because she grew emotionally attached to me.  She also knows that we’re moving in 6 months and that our relationship WILL end then, no matter want, since I’ll be going 400 miles away.

I hope to have fun with her again, but I’m also going to tread cautiously, for both of our sakes…

 Open Marriage  4 Responses »

A Tale of Two Swaps

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Jan 192012
 

[Veronica suggested "A Tale of Two Fucks" for a title, I overruled her. Like I'm that crude ;-) ]

Three plus years into our swinging adventures, of course I know that chemistry is equal important, if not more so, as physical attraction. I suppose I shouldn’t have been surprised when in one weekend that importance is so clearly illustrated for me.

Tammy, object of my fantasies for quite some time. Before we even contacted them, I’d browse their profile pics and think about getting my hands on her. Tall, oh-so pretty, great figure, she’s a delight to look at from head to toe.

Veronica and I met Tammy and Chuck at a bar close to their place.  We grabbed a table, ordered a round of drinks and started to get to know each other. As it turns out we have a number of mutual friends in the lifestyle, not necessarily people we fucked but at least know from parties.  After an hour or so, a loud and not-very-good blues band started playing, which really put a damper on the conversation. We were all enjoying ourselves, so they invited us back to their house.

Looking back, I suppose I should have seen it coming. I enjoyed Tammy’s company, she was every bit as attractive in person, but there just wasn’t a spark of desire there. I certainly enjoyed all that we did together, plus watching her and Veronica play with each, watching Veronica fuck and get fucked by Chuck and for the first time ever seeing Veronica take another man’s load in her mouth.

At the end of the night, it was certainly a good night, but not the great night I was hoping for.

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24 hours later and we’re out again, heading to Lisa and Ed’s house. They had contacted us, my first impression was that she was attractive, nice figure, but not Tammy-hot. I’m an optimist though, so I headed out with a ‘let’s have fun and see what happens” attitude.

They’ve got a great finished basement, bar area, couches and a pool table. We spend quite a bit of time chatting, drinking, and shooting pool. And flirting, Tammy was quite the flirt, casting glances my way, randomly grabbing me, sneaking a kiss now and then. It was fun and most definitely arousing.

Pool becomes strip pool, which leads to more flirting, touching, and arousal. Off to the hot tub we all go, more touching, the girls really get into each other (no pun intended!), then back into the house to continue to fun.

The girls continue, Ed and I join in as we see fit, sometimes watching, sometimes playing.  I seem to remember all 4 of us connected in some fashion, but honestly I can’t recall the exact details!

Eventually I reach the point where my orgasm is imminent, Lisa encourages me to pull out and come on her, which of course I’m more than happy to do. She presented herself to Veronica, who eagerly uses her mouth to clean up the mess I made.

Gotta love when there’s attraction AND chemistry!!

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Veronica: I had a very good time with both couples.

Chuck and Tammy were definitely more of the ‘we all know why we’re here, lets get down to business’ type, which I don’t mind.   I think that Hubman enjoys the flirting and the teasing, and the buildup as much as the actual fucking, and that was not something Chuck and Tammy provided.   However they had just come back from a long day with a bit of travel, so I think that flirting and teasing would simply be part of relationship building with them.

I also found Tammy really hot, and Chuck was attractive as well.  Plus he was a math geek, which I find pretty sexy.  All in all, I would absolutely fuck them again.  Another big plus with Chuck and Tammy is that they live about 20 minutes away from us.  Close enough to easily do a booty call, far away enough that we don’t run into them everywhere.

Ed and Lisa were also a great couple, and I connected pretty well with Lisa.  She had a great sense of humor and was very attractive.  And while I was attracted to and enjoyed fucking Ed, I did not feel a huge connection to him.  He was a little on the bossy side for my tastes.  I would definitely have sex with the two of them again, as I think that his being bossier than I prefer is a communication issue that can be worked through.

All I can say that any weekend where I fuck five people is a really good weekend.

 

 

 

 Fucking, Open Marriage  8 Responses »

Names

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Nov 142011
 

I don’t exactly have an uncommon first name. According to How Many of Me, there are over 3,700,000 men who share my first name in the US, which makes it the 6th most common.

With that in mind, this is a bit like the pot calling the kettle black, but damn ladies, why do so many of you have similar names?

The problem is, as a swinger who has been known to occasionally sext and share pics with certain friends (yes really!), there’s the risk of sending a message or photo to the wrong person.

Case in point, we have a blogger friend in Florida and a swinger friend nearby who share a first name. I once texted a photo meant for the local friend to the friend in Florida and made a remark about looking forward to seeing her soon. The puzzled reply clued me in (I’m a little slow sometimes) that I might have sent it to the wrong person. Fortunately I had shared similar types of photos with the friend in Florida before, so it was all good.

There have been some close calls though. Remember Katie, who I had a 7 month relationship with? That’s not her real first name (surprise!), she and my sister share the same name. All it took was one fortunately innocuous text to my sister but meant for Katie to keep me on my toes from then on!

Looking in my phone contacts, there are 8 women who share a first name. One I know from childhood, the rest are all friends from blogging or Twitter. I’ve met 4 of the 7 and slept with 2 of them. And, those 2 have the same number of letters & syllables in their last names, so a quick glance won’t do, I need to stop and think “is this who I want to send this to?”

It’s only a matter of time before I fuck up and text the wrong person.

I know, it’s a rough life I lead, keeping my naughty friends straight :-)

 Open Marriage  14 Responses »

Back and Forth

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Oct 272011
 

Veronica is on her hands and knees on the hotel room bed, our friend is by her side and watching me fuck her. Remembering something that our friend once told me, I reach over and grab her head.

Slick with Veronica’s juices, I push my cock into her mouth, then keep pushing until she’s taken all of me. With a firm handful of hair, I keep my cock there for just a moment longer than she’s comfortable with. Releasing her from my grasp, I withdraw and slip back into Veronica’s cunt.

Did Veronica even realize what I was doing while I left there, ass up in the air, cunt so rudely left wanting for something inside?

Back and forth I go
Fucking Veronica
Fucking our friends mouth
Fucking Veronica

Over and over, making sure our friend get to fulfill her fantasy of sucking my cock intermingled with the taste of Veronica.

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3+ years of swinging and numerous 3somes with a variety of women, and yet I’m still experiencing some things for the first time.

I love my life :-)

 Open Marriage  5 Responses »

Expectations Exceeded

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Sep 252011
 

A year ago, she caught my eye on Twitter and I started following her.

10 months ago, she changed her avatar to a provocative cleavage image. I DM’d her and asked if there might be other, even more revealing, photos of her out there, if I looked hard enough. There weren’t, but that didn’t stop her from emailing me a little visual treat.

7 or 8 months ago, she and her husband opened up their marriage. Veronica and I offered some advice to them and we’d like to think that we’ve helped them successfully navigate the open-marriage waters.  (Veronica- I always love hearing from people who are thinking about opening things up.  The open marriage people are a great community)

4 months ago, she and I thought we might have a chance to meet. Too bad I was in her timezone, and she in mine, at the same time.

2 months ago, another opportunity arose. She was coming to somewhere on the east coast for a week for a conference. Calendars were checked, spouses were consulted, and soon thereafter I bought my plane ticket.

3 days ago, I was sitting in the lobby of her hotel, waiting for her to walk in the door. We were going to have almost 48 hrs together…

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It’s always interesting meeting friends from blogging or Twitter. Will you hit it off really well? Just get along? Not get along that well at all?  Physical attraction, even after extensive photo [and some video :-) ] sharing, isn’t enough. We’ve committed to spending 2 nights together, after only speaking on the phone once before. We’re pretty sure we’ll get along fine, but you never know.

Fortunately, our mutual concerns were quickly cast aside and we established a wonderful personal connection.

Hours of pillow talk in the room

Wandering around a city neither of us knew well at all, even though I’d spent some time in the area before

Taking photographs with her. Thanks to her, I now have 3 weeks of Wanton Wednesday photos, at 3 more Scavenger Hunt locations, ready to go. You might even get to see some of her.

Walking hand in hand through a park and having an older gentlemen remark that we looked like such a nice couple.

Talking about family, friends, Twitter friends, relationships, experiences

We never lacked for conversation. Or for desire to stop the talking for a bit and to fuck yet again.

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I’m not revealing the identity of my Twitter friend, her online persona is a little more vanilla and no one there knows that she has an open marriage. I’m also not writing about our sexual escapades. We had fun, over and over and over, but the details are between she and I.

I will say this about her- she was fabulous :-)

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Veronica: I know that for some people it might seem odd that I am fine with Hubman buying a plane ticket and fucking another woman.  I remember back when we had blog drama some people ripped into me for ‘staying home and baking cookies while my husband fucks other women.’  But you know, I like it.   It turns me on to think of Hubman pleasing, and being pleasured by someone else.  While I do not ask for tons of details, I do hear (and if I’m lucky see pictures) about the sexy fun that happened while I was making spreadsheet magic at work or reading “The Very Fairy Princess” for the 100th time.

One of the benefits of having an open marriage is that it gives us the chance to explore things that the other person might not be as excited about.  While Hubman and I are very compatible and enjoy experimenting, there are things that don’t work for us, either due to the 10″ height difference or a simple desire to try something the other person may not be interested in.  Having other partners gives us almost unlimited opportunities for experimentation, which is pretty stinking awesome.

And at the end of the day, you can’t leave out the emotional component.  Hubman and I may share our bodies with other people, and even deeply care about these people, but he is my Hubman and I will always be his number #1 girl.   It is this security in our love and commitment to each other that allows me to encourage him to go out and follow his heart (cock) and have fun.

 Open Marriage  11 Responses »

The Break Up

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Sep 172011
 

I’m not very good at it.

Frustration had been building in my relationship with Katie. She was consistently turning down opportunities to get together but also saying how she missed spending time with me. Basically she was becoming more emotionally attached to me and starting to feel used when we just got together for sex.

There’s more to it than that, but I don’t want to go into any more detail. I decided that it was time to call it quits with her.

I knew she was at work and wouldn’t be available to talk, so I texted and asked her to call me that evening when she had the chance. I wanted her to hear it directly from me, not from a text message or email.

She responded “Ok”, then never called.

The next day I got an email from her. Out of the blue she asks me if I’ve ever considered that she might be uncomfortable having sex at my house.

Excuse me? That’s the only place we’ve ever had sex!

Most of the time, we would take advantage of Veronica not being home. On several occasions though, knowing that we wanted to spend some alone time, Veronica would offer to leave for a while so Katie and I could have fun. Pretty generous of Veronica, right?  Now all of a sudden it’s an arrangement that she’s not comfortable with. Then she concludes the message by saying that she had no plans for the night and would be free for a romp in the sack.

I didn’t bother responding and waited for the call from her.

After a week, I send her the email I didn’t want to send. I couldn’t just call her, that was against the rules we had established so that I wouldn’t put her into a rough spot with her husband (besides the fact that I’ve been fucking her for 6 months).

I wasn’t antagonist or argumentative, I just told her that I thought we were heading in different directions and I wasn’t prepared to give her what she was looking for now.

Her reply was pretty short, I know she was hurt and maybe caught a little off-guard.

Do I send her a message reaffirming that our relationship is over?

No, I leave open the possibility of meeting up again.

That wasn’t fair to do at all, stringing her along like that. We haven’t been in touch since then, it’s been a week. I hope she’s doing ok.

 Open Marriage  11 Responses »

Bad Ideas

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Jul 172011
 

Katie and I been seeing each other for 5 months or so now and have been having some good times. She and Veronica get along well, I’ve met her best friend and she approves of me, and of course the sex is out-fucking-standing. I’ve been disappointed that while Katie is bi- and has talked about numerous girl-girl experiences in the past, she has expressed a reluctance to join Veronica and I for a threesome. But that’s a relatively minor thing and talking about that is a whole other post in itself…

But every once in a while she suggests something that makes me shake my head and wonder “what are you thinking?!”

Two or 3 months ago, her best friend Kelly and Kelly’s son were over for dinner on a Saturday night. It had been a little while since I had seen Katie and she suggested that Veronica and I along with the kids come over.  Oh yeah, and her hubby was home.

Really? You want me to go to your house and in one night meet you husband, daughter, best friend and her kid? Never mind explaining how you know me to your husband.  Needless to say, we declined the invitation.

More recently, she suggested that she and I go to her house to play while her hubby is out of town. They have a summer place up in Maine. Katie often works weekends, so her hubby and daughter will go up without her, leaving her free to see me. Veronica has been quite generous, offering to leave our house for a while so that Katie and I can play, but Katie often feels guilty about that arrangement.  At first I was adamant about not fucking at her house, but knowing her hubby was up in Maine, I was okay with the idea.  Looking back, that was a bad idea too. I don’t have much problem with fucking a married woman behind her husbands back, but not in his own house, that crosses a line for me, I just couldn’t get comfortable there. Judge me however you’d like for that distinction…

Lastly, she’s been asking about swinging. I mentioned that she’s reluctant to join Veronica and I for a threesome. She’s also oddly shy about any display of affection in front of Veronica. Whether I’m kissing or touching her in front of Veronica or vice versa, Katie quickly becomes visibly embarrassed by it.

She’s expressed some curiosity about swinging, how we find partners, how often we play, things like that. I’ve always been honest when answering her questions, but I’ve also been cautious about over-sharing. A few days ago she suggested that perhaps the next time Veronica and I went to a swingers party that perhaps she could come with us.

Considering her discomfort with nothing more than routine displays of affection, and her jealousy issues with my possibly fucking other women, I told her that it was not a very good idea.

It’s a good thing she’s so damn enthusiastic about getting fucked in the ass, some days she has some really bad ideas…

A photo from the archives, think of it as my thanks for reading my whining about my girlfriend :-)

 Open Marriage  8 Responses »

Missed Connection

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Jun 122011
 

Last Friday when Veronica and I were in Denver I woke up to this e-mail
“Still in Denver? I am in town and would love to meet you and your wife”

Obviously, this caught my interest, more so because I had absolutely no idea who the sender was!

I replied “We’re here until Saturday morning. Have we crossed paths before in the online world?”

“I enjoy your blog…especially your photography. (I’m not one that posts comments though.)  When I read your business travel entries, I think..damn..I wish hubman would travel to Denver :) ”

We exchanged a few more messages and she quickly hinted that if we met and there was chemistry that she was looking for more than just a “hi, nice to meet you” kind of evening.  As if there was any doubt, she included a photo of her ass in which she’s wearing a black thong  and she said “If I can work it out I would love to have a drink with you and your cute wife….maybe even have you untie my bow!”

I’ve enjoyed meeting numerous readers over the years, and some of those meetings have lead to fun times behind closed doors (yeah yeah don’t act so surprised…), but I don’t think I’ve ever had someone be so up front about the possibility!  I liked it :-)

Unfortunately, Veronica and I only had 1 night left in town and our new friend was not able to get a sitter on such short notice so we couldn’t meet up.  After she later showed me her pretty smiling face, I was even more disappointed we couldn’t connect.  Oh well, it’s still nice to think about what could have been…

 Open Marriage  2 Responses »

Sharing

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May 082011
 

I was away for work and amusing myself during a quiet evening in my hotel room by sending pictures to Katie while she was at work. Her response is usually a combination of thankful “oh very nice” and naive “how could you? you dirty boy!”

Just as I was starting to wonder what she thought of the random naked pictures I was sharing, I get this text message:

“Oh, my gal pal like it too”

“What?!”

“My best bud Kelly. Sorry I can’t contain my happiness any longer. I needed to show your handsome cock. Please don’t be mad”

Mad?  Hahaha, little does she know how much of myself I’ve shown on the internet over the past several years :-) I told her that I wasn’t mad and didn’t mind her sharing with Kelly. I knew of Kelly, she’s Katie’s coworker and running partner, she knew about Katie’s Ashley Madison adventure before she and I ever met and Kelly has been a trusted confidant for her.

“I showed her the one in the shower too. You saw the pic of her”

It’s true, I’ve seen pictures of Kelly, she’s a very attractive (and single!) woman. Now if only I could entice her into sharing some naked pictures of herself. Katie says she’s got a great figure and looks fantastic in a bikini.

Would it surprise anyone to know that I’ve had thoughts of Veronica-Hubman-Katie-Kelly group fun?

 Open Marriage  6 Responses »

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