What book?
Sadie’s book, Open All The Way, of course!
Many of us in the “sex-blogger” and HNT realms of the blogosphere are of course familiar with Sadie and her blog, Sexy Sadie’s Stories of Seduction: Confessions From My Open Marriage. Considering that I’m the 14th or so stop on her virtual book tour, you almost might know that she’s written a book and self-published it as an e-book. Her book isn’t just a retelling of confessions that she’s already shared on her incredibly well-written and thoughtful blog, the e-book is the prologue to the blog.
Just how open Sadie approaches her life (and lifestyle) is captured in this chapter, the only chapter than overlaps with her blogging, which talks about how she shared not only her lifestyle but her blog with her mother.
Thankfully my mom waited a while before she worked up the courage to do an Internet search for “Sadie blog, Open Marriage.” She found it easily and read every page, skimming over the more colorful parts, yet still managing to glean insight as to what I’d been up to in my not-so-private life. And although some of what she read distressed her, due mostly to concerns for my safety, she was able to see past the brashness of some of my posts and see me in the shadows of my words. And she did not judge.
She reminded me that she was from a different generation: the era of sex as a closed-door activity. Where she hailed from, sex wasn’t something that was spoken about publicly, nor was it used as a means of self-expression. And as far as she knew, sex itself had no relevance to a particular lifestyle—one that people might enjoy reading about in a public forum. But I was pleased that my mother was able to see the me that I ached to present to her; the me who had carved out her own little place in cyberspace, the me who had much to say on the subject of sex and all its variances, the me who she could now recognize as consequential and capable and even sometimes entertaining.
The value in that was absolutely immeasurable.
And since then I have discovered that, even though my mother might not always approve of what I do or how I do it, she doesn’t judge me for my choices. She understands that they are mine to make. Besides, above all else, she is happy that I am writing
I’ve had the pleasure of meeting Sadie in person twice, in Texas last summer and again in the fall at the 2011 NYC Sex Blogger Calendar release party (she’s Ms November). A piece of Sadie trivia, that she may not even remember- almost 2 yrs ago, when Veronica and I were thinking about starting a semi-regular open relationship advice column, she’s the one who suggested “Swing Shift” when we were looking for a title for the column. She’s one of the diminishing group of people I’ve known ever since I’ve been blogging, I think our respective original blogs were started around the same time. Even if I hadn’t known her for that long, and have a soft spot in my heart for her (and a hard on in my pants 
) I’d still tell you,
Maybe if we didn’t have kids that cost us $15/hr for a sitter we’d consider them, but it’s just not practical. Which is exactly what I tell them- they’re hot and we’d like to meet, but they’re too far away.
Things I'm enjoying lately
Emmy posted something similar back in August, and imitation being the sincerest form of flattery or something like that, I’m doing the same. Sometimes we focus on the difficult things, the problems we’re having, thinks we don’t like or that irritate us. So I’m taking a few minutes to write down some things that I’m enjoying lately.
- My kids. Darling Boy never ceases to amaze me with his imagination and vocabulary. He’s doing really well in school and in karate and his teachers can’t say enough nice things about him. Princess Persistent always brings a smile to my face with her attitude, smile, laugh, and overall demeanor. Best of all, she is just about potty-trained. Woohoo!! They are undeniably the best part of my life.
- Work. I know, right? But really, it’s pretty good lately. I enjoy what I do and am well compensated for my work. Not too much in the way of bureaucratic headaches and I often go home feeling like I’ve made a good dent in the almighty to-do list that day. Plus, I’ve fallen into some sort of mentoring role with 2 co-workers and am excited about how some data that I’m working on is looking. Which is a twisted way of saying that I’m gaining satisfaction with statistics. Perhaps I need professional help there…
- Family. My sister is about 6 months pregnant with her first child. She’s several hours away and I don’t see her much at all, but I’m excited for her and my BIL and also about becoming an uncle for the first time. My stepdad was seriously ill for most of last winter and spent several months in a collection of hospitals, rehab centers and nursing homes. We were so concerned that DB and I flew out to visit him in mid-February because we thought he might not make it. But now he’s doing really well and celebrated his 86th birthday last week.
- Lifestyle. Veronica and I have a fantastic sex life, which is only made better with the occasional inclusion of certain friends. I once could only dream about doing some of the things I now do on a semi-regular basis. Yes, I’m a very lucky man!
- Travel. For the first 14 yrs Veronica and I were married, we couldn’t travel much at all. Between being young and poor, various graduate programs [hers and mine], and children, we couldn’t afford to travel much. But in the last year alone, Veronica went to OsTour 2008, we helped a friend afford to trip to come see us, we went to Miami for a mid-winter weekend getaway, she came with me to Seattle for a week when I had a conference there, and of course we just went to Las Vegas 2 weeks ago. In the coming year I have a conference in Anaheim which Veronica will accompany me to and she’ll join me for a long weekend or two when I go to Texas for 2 months later in the year. Thank goodness for a little disposable income and retired grandparents to watch the kids!
- Photography. I really enjoyed the Photoshop class I recently took and am exploring what I can do with my camera. I think that a digital SLR might be in my future. My 40th birthday is this winter, after all….
- Blogging. You ever go through those periods when you don’t feel like writing, or you’re disappointed in the reaction, or lack of, to posts you publish? I know I have, but not lately! I often receive good, insightful comments on my posts, there is an absence of trolls, and for whatever reason, site visits to my blog have increased almost 50% in the last month. I don’t know where you’re all coming from, but I’m glad you’re here and hope you keep coming back!! Perhaps most satisfying is that the days when I get the most visits aren’t always Thursdays- it appears I’m not just a piece of ass, at least to some of you
- My blogger friends. There are a number of bloggers of who have become good friends, some of whom I have had the pleasure of meeting, others whom I hope to meet someday. I’m not going to name drop, they know who they are. And even if I may never get to chance to meet some of them, all of blogger friends are part of what make me happy.
- Veronica. This list would not be complete without her. Nothing else I’ve written about today would be the same without her. She’s been making me happy for 19 yrs and counting!
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So what about you, what’s been making you happy lately? Feel free to steal this idea for a post of your own or share your thougths in the comments.
Don’t forget to visit Tits for Troops today, a new post is up. As usual you can find Veronica and I there and I happen to know a lovely lady who is making her anonymous debut this week.