This was paired with the Date Night Bra, (partly) seen on Day 205. We had a fabulous time with some new friends on Friday night 
18-105mm lens at 45 mm, 1/5 sec at f/4.8, ISO 1600
Aug 272011
Aug 142011
Even better in bed.
Or should I say, better on the floor? That would be more accurate
Oh wait, I’m getting ahead of the story, we haven’t even introduced them yet.
Veronica and I were waaay overdue for a fun night with another couple, it had literally been over almost a year, since our anniversary weekend in Dallas last summer. There was Sandy and John (and his monster cock) last December, but I was more a spectator than a participant that night. In March there was Lynn and John who we introduced here but we never wrote the follow-up post about the second date. The sex was VERY good but they’re a separate-room-swap couple and it just isn’t the same for us that way. Of course there’s Katie, she and I have been seeing each other for 6 months, but she hasn’t joined us for any FMF fun.
Bottom line, Veronica was more than ready for some girl-girl fun!
Veronica: Yes I was. While we were coming off a dryspell, I think that things had just been soooo insane for us with work and travel that we had just not put the necessary effort into meeting people, so it was a dryspell by choice.
I like when Veronica says she’s “going shopping” and logs onto one of the swinger websites we have a profile on, that means she’s looking for a couple that catches her eye. She knows my taste in women so I just wait for her to tell me who she contacted.
I saw the couple on one of our websites. She had a cute figure and he was also nice looking. After seeing their face pictures we learned that she had a sweet face and he kind of looked like Matthew Broderick. My fantasy of fucking Ferris Beuller could finally come true.
I sent them an introduction email and we quickly escalated to opening up the private galleries and I soon offered them my phone number. A week or so went by and we had not heard from them after they had sent an email saying that they wanted to meet us, so I sent another e-mail to follow up. I am sometimes torn about the follow up email. I don’t want to sound stalkerish. However since they had indicated a desire to meet, I sent that follow up e-mail. I am glad I did. Jack and Carla had been extra busy with vacation and other obligations, and shortly after that e-mail Carla and I were texting and then chatting.
I had already organized a sitter for Friday night since we had originally thought we would go to a swinger party at an onsite club about an hour from our house. When they suggested meeting for drinks on Friday night, it did not take much effort on my part to get Hubman to change his mind about going to a party.
Carla had heard about the place we were planning on going to and told us a little about it. Apparently they’re not very good about keeping it to a reasonable number of single guys and there were some concerns about maintaining a respectful and consensual atmosphere. Even though we had plans to meet a single woman there, we changed our plans based on what Carla had to say about the place.
Friday afternoon comes and Carla texts Veronica “Would you guys be interested in meeting somewhere closer to our house? We unexpectedly find ourselves kid-free tonight and we could head back there after meeting for drinks, if everyone wants to”
It certainly seemed like the night held some promise of a good time!
Now all we had to do was actually meet them and hope the chemistry was there. But you already know the answer to that.
To be continued…
Mar 092011
Waaaay back when Veronica and I started swinging, our first two swaps were in different rooms, she’d go off with him to one room, I’d go with her to another room. Ever since then whenever we’ve swapped with another couple, it’s always been in the same room, often all 4 of us on the same bed.
Until we met Lynn and John…
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As soon as we sat down across from them in the restaurant, I knew I’d like her. I know I was attracted to her from her photos on the swingers website, tall, trim, athletic figure, pretty face, she definitely caught my eye. And just like a few other women I’ve met in the last several months, she had fairly modest profile pictures. Her public pictures were of her in bikini panties and a bra, her private pictures showed her face.
Veronica: John was handsome with twinkly eyes that hinted at a wicked sense of humor (the hint was correct). He was not much taller than I, maybe 5’6″ or 5’7″ but he owns his height and is comfortable with it. I was actually happy to see that he was shorter than his wife, because that meant that he is a confident man. He also had a solid, slightly stocky build, which I like, as I am not a fan of very thin men. I like my lovers with some meat on their bones.
We talked about a variety of topics, as is often the case in the lifestyle we talked about past experiences and how we ended up where we are today. We learned that Lynn had experimented with girl-girl sex, at least being on the receiving end of oral sex, and learned that she really wasn’t into girls. I suspect that Veronica was disappointed, but I also had a feeling that she liked John enough that it wasn’t a deal-breaker. They also shared that they prefer to swap in different rooms, again it wasn’t a deal breaker.
Veronica: Conversation flowed easily during dinner. It turned out that we both have mischievous beagles and sarcastic senses of humor. We were also both transplants to New England. We share the stories of how we each came into the lifestyle, and Lynn explained that she is not into girls, and that they prefer separate rooms. I was a little disappointed that there would be no girl play as I really enjoy it, but in a way its almost easier as we only have to have chemistry between me and John and between Hubman and Lynn.
I was right, I knew that Veronica would be disappointed in not getting the chance to play with Lynn!
They also let us know they prefer separate room swap. John later explained that part of the reason is that Lynn had experienced pressure to participate in girl play in the past when they were in the same room and that the issue is avoided when they are in separate rooms.
I hadn’t thought about the girl-girl issue and how that might effect Lynn’s comfort level, that makes sense. I had remembered them talking about preferring to focus on their respective partners but now that Veronica mentions it, concerns about Lynn’s comfort level rings a bell.
When talking about our preferences it turns out that we both have the same rules about not playing on the 1st date, except when they don’t. Apparently when they had a first date with another couple, John and the other woman could not wait and had a quickie in the bathroom. So of course when Hubman and Lynn had to go to the bathroom around the same time, we had to tease them about behaving.
Yes, we behaved! But we had a good chuckle thinking about making Veronica and John suspect otherwise
John gets up at early o’ clock for his job, so sadly the evening had to end. We pay the bill and walk to the parking lot, when the 2nd major chemistry test of the night happens. The good night kiss. Lynn and I hugged and I turned my attention to John and Hubman turned his attention to Lynn. Thankfully John was a good kisser who knew how to use his tongue to good effect. He also gave me a butt squeeze, which I reciprocated.
I, however, just got a regular kiss on the mouth and no butt squeeze. Still, it was a very nice kiss.
Unfortunately it would take us almost a month and a half to finally get together a second time.
Veronica: We had some scheduling issues and my procedure put me out of commission for a few weeks. However, as soon as I was cleared I sent John a text letting him know that I was cleared for action. We had a second date scheduled for three days after that text.
For now, I’ll just say she was well worth the wait 
Veronica: As was he
Feb 272011
We have Janie!
Janie is one of the ladies who saw and responded to my Ashley Madison profile before I even had a chance to browse some profiles and contact anyone myself. So, who is this woman?
45 yrs old, 5’8″, 135 lbs, so far so good!
Attached, looking for some excitement that seems to be missing from home, checks off a ton of check-boxes on her profile but she also took the time to write a little bit about herself, which is encouraging. She’s a little further away than I’d prefer, 45 minutes or so, but I decide to pursue her and see what happens.
What’s this? She’s also given me the “key” to her “private showcase” and there are 2 face pictures. Hey, she’s really good looking!
We exchange a couple of messages on AM then share e-mail addresses, I share a slightly more revealing picture of my face than I have in my profile and we exchange phone numbers. (Nobody ever did guess which of my HNT photos they thought I might be using for my private showcase.)
It’s a Thursday morning, I’m at work and she texts me, asking if I have a few minutes to talk. Sure, why not? I close my office door (yay for having my own office!) and give her a call.
I have to say, we spent about 15 minutes on the phone and the conversation flowed easily, she’s easy to chat with and seems comfortable hearing about the arrangement that Veronica and I have. She seemed concerned that maybe I was just looking for a woman to join Veronica and I, and while we’d certainly consider that, I tell her that’s not what we’re looking for, this is about me finding a friend with benefits. I told her that I was traveling the next day and would be away for a few days but that once I returned I would get in touch.
Maybe this is where I messed up…
After I got back, I kinda forgot about her for a few days, it ended up being a full week after we spoke until I contacted her again.
And got no reply.
I gave her a couple of days, then e-mailed her again, asking if her lack of response indicated a change of heart.
And got no reply to that e-mail either.
While I have her phone number, I don’t know if her hubby might see a text message from me or when would be a good time that I wouldn’t have to worry about causing trouble for her. I’ll have to be content with non-responses to my e-mails and move on.
Fortunately, behind curtain number 2 there’s Katie…
Feb 202011
“I can’t ever see Veronica and I reaching a point where one of us stays home with the kids while the other one of us goes out on a date”
File that statement under “famous last words”. I’m not sure if I ever wrote those exact words somewhere, but I know that I had long felt that way. While it’s true that I’ve met and had some very enjoyable times with friends in the course of my travels for work, we always viewed that differently, since I was already away from home and it wasn’t taking away from family time.
With a few exceptions (my FWB in San Antonio, the former stripper that Slippery When Wet hooked me up with), most of these partners all have something in common- they’re married but sexually unsatisfied. Tangent time…
I realize that with the passage of years, people change, desires wax and wane, whatever. There are all sorts of reasons why someone might choose to seek the pleasure of another without their spouses consent, and I don’t want this to read as a carte blanche condemnation of infidelity.
Read the rest of the post here.
That’s what I said, and almost 2 years later I still feel the same way. What’s more, if she’s cheating with me, that’s not my fault. If Veronica were to cheat on me, I would blame her, and I would blame myself, but not the man (or woman) she’s cheating on me with.
Seduction isn’t making someone do what they don’t want to do.
Seduction is enticing someone into doing what they want to do already.
Back in early January when Veronica’s surgery was first scheduled, she brought up the idea of my finding a local playmate while she was out of commission for several weeks. Isn’t she good to me?
Veronica: We had discussed it before then, as I had always been turned on by Hubman’s adventures. Just like the husband of a hotwife gets turned on hearing about the adventures of his partner, I find it arousing that Hubman is able to share his sexual talents and tell me about it later. Also, one of the things I like about our group encounters is the smell and taste of the other woman on Hubman, and if he limits his experiences to travel time, then I don’t get to enjoy that. However, having sex with Hubman and getting a whiff of his other lover is pretty hot for me.
Its also been great that for the most part the women he has been with on the road have been so kind and thoughtful, even sending me a ‘thanks for sharing’ e-mail or phone call.
I am not worried about Hubman falling in love with another woman, because I really believe that the more love you send out into the universe, the more love comes back to you. (New Agey- I know.)
So this new phase of openness has been on the horizon for a while in the abstract, but having a multi-week ban on sex really gave us an impetus to put the plan in motion.
Back in January, on my birthday actually, I took this picture and teased you with the question of whether it was Veronica or I or both of us who were creating a profile on a particular dating site.
Now how to go about writing that profile? Stay tuned…
Jan 312011
Last week I was e-mailing back and forth with a blogger friend who along with her husband is relatively new to swinging. She brought up a situation that elicited some unexpected emotions, so with her permission I’m posting our exchange (she requested to remain anonymous).
So, there’s a swinger’s question for you… do you and Veronica always swing together or do you get to play on your own as well? How about Veronica? Does she have playmates that she can see without you? Have you two always met each other’s playmates before any playing occurs? We got together with A&B from the Christmas swinger’s party last weekend, and B (girl) had crashed and J was on the verge of crashing. A and I were still playing. C didn’t feel comfortable letting us continue while he went to bed (they had a spare room, where we were going to be staying), so he stopped us. A went upstairs to join B, and C and I went to our room, where I at least got some of his cock.
C’s uncomfortableness that night brought up a discussion about how he doesn’t think he’ll ever feel comfortable letting me fuck someone else without him there. There are just too many things that could go wrong. yada yada yada.
I found this way more upsetting than I probably should have.
Since you’ve been in the lifestyle longer than we have, I’m curious about your take on this situation.
The part of my response about Veronica or I playing alone isn’t relevant, here’s the part that is
The situation with A&B, it sounds like a scenario came up that perhaps you and C hadn’t considered yet. Veronica and I have 2 cardinal rules in swinging- respecting boundaries and no taking one for the team. C is your hubby and you HAVE to respect his feelings, if he’s not comfortable with something, it’s okay to discuss it (some other time than in the midst of play), but don’t push it or ask him to do something or allow you to do something. Give it time, Veronica and I have found that our boundaries have shifted the longer we’ve been open, as the travel stuff indicates. Maybe C will get to a place where he’s comfortable with separate play, but maybe not, and you have to be ready to accept that.
Veronica didn’t chime in on the original e-mail exchange, so she’s taking the opportunity now
Veronica: When Hubman and I started swinging we had a lot of rules. Now we have very few. Having an open marriage requires a lot of trust and communication, and while you can’t anticipate every issue (although if you read all 40 volumes of Swing Shift before you dipped a toe into the lifestyle you might) you need to be able to set your basic rules and then have regular discussions about them.
For us playing alone, that opportunity came about due to Hubman’s work travel. When we first started playing I was not at all comfortable with the idea of Hubman’s playing alone, but now I enjoy hearing about it and encourage his adventures.
How did we do, dear readers? Any thoughts that you’d like to add for this couples consideration?
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This is where we ask for feedback- do you have experiences you’d like to share? Disagree with anything that we’ve said? Have we overlooked anything that you’d like to point out? That’s what the comments section is for, so don’t be shy!!
Swing Shift started in June of 2009 in response to questions we received from readers interested in swinging and open relationships. When we started swinging we had on-line friends who were our mentors, helping us navigate the open waters. These posts are our way of paying it forward and sharing our lessons learned. If you have a topic suggestion or question for a future Swing Shift, contact me at hubman38@gmail.com and indicate if you’d prefer to remain anonymous or not. The full archives can be found here.
Jan 182011
Or, a tale of two attempted dates!
About a week and a half ago Veronica and I had a date with a very nice couple. Attraction all around, good conversation over dinner, we have numerous things in common, really, we haven’t had a first date that good in quite a while. Soon enough we made plans to get together again, clearly we all intended on ending the night getting naked together.
Then the text arrives…
“My UTI hasn’t cleared up yet. I think I’m going to have to cancel. I’m so sorry!!”
Damn, cockblocked by a UTI!
Veronica: I was really bummed when I got the text, but as soon as I realized that the date wasn’t happening, I texted Sally, and told her I had a sitter and why don’t we get together. Thankfully, I’m always thinking.
Now what? We have a sitter booked, worse case is Veronica and I go out for dinner, it’s always nice when just the 2 of us get out for a quiet dinner without the kids. But what about Paul and Sally? We haven’t seen them since last May but have stayed in touch and have talked about getting together again one of these days. Woohoo, they’re available and looking forward to seeing us again!
We make plans to meet at a local sports bar and watch the Patriots-Jets game and talk about coming back to our house afterward. We enjoy the game (us more than them, they’re die-hard Patriots fans) and a lot of flirty banter and discreet touching, it was really nice to see her again. As the game is ending, they get a text from their 16 yr old daughter, who was supposed to be spending the night at a friends house. She changed her mind, she wanted them to come pick her up.
Damn, cockblocked by a teen!
Veronica: At first I was worried in my usual paranoid way that maybe they did not want to have sex with us, but I got text from both of them within 1 half hour of us going home talking about how they wanted to rip my clothes off. So we will have to rebook with them soon.
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The moral of the story?
Just because we didn’t have naked fun with friends, new or old, it doesn’t mean we didn’t have a great time. We got out, spent some vanilla time with non-vanilla friends and had some awesome sex when we got home, just the two of us
We’ve always maintained that swinging is fun, ‘sport-fucking’ with friends. When it’s not fun, when finding playmates is more annoyance than anything else (and there have been those times), then it’s time to take a break.
If having an open relationship is adding stress to your life and isn’t fun, maybe you’re doing something wrong and need to reevaluate.
Veronica: At the end of an evening, when things don’t go as planned, you just have to laugh. If you can’t laugh then you need to re-evaluate your participation.
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This is where we ask for feedback- do you have experiences you’d like to share? Disagree with anything that we’ve said? Have we overlooked anything that you’d like to point out? That’s what the comments section is for, so don’t be shy!!
Swing Shift started in June of 2009 in response to questions we received from readers interested in swinging and open relationships. When we started swinging we had on-line friends who were our mentors, helping us navigate the open waters. These posts are our way of paying it forward and sharing our lessons learned. If you have a topic suggestion or question for a future Swing Shift, contact me at hubman38@gmail.com and indicate if you’d prefer to remain anonymous or not. The full archives can be found here.
Jan 102011
No reader submitted questions or comments to respond to this week (Even though we do have some to get to in the coming weeks, feel free to suggest a column if you’ve got an idea!).
Some of our readers might be under the impression that we’ve successfully navigated the open relationship waters with minimal challenges. Well, nothing could be further from the truth, is this is where we share some of our mistakes.
Veronica: After all, its through sharing our mistakes, that we can hopefully prevent our readers from making the same errors.
Fucking in the living room
One of our first mistakes? With the very first couple that we swapped with!
Veronica: With B&K we made a few errors. The biggest error we made was my having sex with B in our living room, while the kids were in their bedrooms, right down the hall. Now Hubman and I frequently have sex in the living room, (hopefully tonight) and I rarely worry about the kids discovering us there, or if they every did, we would be embarrassed, but everyone would get over it. However, mommy having sex with someone that’s not daddy? Not such a good idea. So now we bring our playmates into the basement, where we can shut the door and if one of the kids is making noise, I can toss on a robe and attend to them.
Although I hate to use the word error, we had a small issue when I let B come in my mouth. Hubman and I had not discussed that particular boundary beforehand and when I mentioned it to him afterwards, he was unsettled. This is why you always have to communicate.
Hubman: Sometimes, you think you’ve talked about everything, considered all that you would or would not be comfortable with. Or maybe you really did, only to discover that you’re own reaction surprises you. That’s what happened with me.
Veronica: However, I kind of give ourselves a break. It was our first time and no first time is perfect.
Playmates meeting the kids
Veronica: Our general preference if for playmates who are parents. We find that even if they no longer have young children, people who have children are more understanding to the scheduling issues that can arise when you are working with sitters and such. However, when you do meet people with children, they can also have sitter issues so sometimes in order to be able to actually get to meet, or because we enjoy their company socially, we invite them over to hang out while our kids are awake. The issue with this is one that is probably very familiar to our readers who are single parents. Relationships don’t always work out. Thankfully our kids have not asked, “Hey whatever happened to so and so?” but since it is a possibility, we generally avoid having our playmates meet our kids until we have a pretty established relationship with them.
Hubman: I think about Ned and Ann. They came over for dinner, the kids met them, and then Ned and Ann were never seen again. Fortunately the kids weren’t that inquisitive about what happened to our friends, though someday as the kids get older that’s going to change. Since then we’ve become more cautious about our lifestyle friends meeting the kids. Single parents who are on the dating scene, how do you handle when the kids meet a boyfriend or girlfriend? I’m curious.
Face pictures
Veronica: This one is pretty obvious. Sitters cost $15 per hour up here, so a date night can easily run us $45 before we’ve even ordered a drink. Now I don’t mind spending the money and the date just not working out, or the chemistry being lacking, but hiring a sitter for a date that if we had seen a face picture (or a recent picture, cough slow unicorn cough) we never would have left the house for, really frosts me.
Hubman: Not that that’s ever happened to us. Oh wait, it has.
Is a women there/interested?
Veronica: This also goes to the face picture concept. If we all get together and there just happens to be no chemistry that is fine. It happens and having everyone like each other and want to get naked with everyone can be more challenging than you might think. However, getting together to find out that 1/2 the couple is being dragged into this, that is a wasted evening that Hubman and I could have spent just enjoying each others company.
Hubman: This one actually happened before we ever swapped, the day before we swapped with B&K, as a matter of fact. We had just created our profile on a swingers website earlier that week and we were so happy that a couple was interested in us that we jumped at the opportunity without noticing the clues that were there upon reflection. The funny thing about this particular night, it started our tradition of Dairy Queen after an unfortunate date. Gotta get something good out of the night!
Since then, we’ve gotten pretty good at figuring out that a “couple” is really one, or at least she’s not aware of what he’s doing. Which unfortunately happens far too often, as far as I’m concerned.
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This is where we ask for feedback- do you have experiences you’d like to share? Disagree with anything that we’ve said? Have we overlooked anything that you’d like to point out? That’s what the comments section is for, so don’t be shy!!
Swing Shift started in June of 2009 in response to questions we received from readers interested in swinging and open relationships. When we started swinging we had on-line friends who were our mentors, helping us navigate the open waters. These posts are our way of paying it forward and sharing our lessons learned. If you have a topic suggestion or question for a future Swing Shift, contact me at hubman38@gmail.com and indicate if you’d prefer to remain anonymous or not. The full archives can be found here.
Jan 092011
Or Veronica experiments with being a unicorn…
Since this story is more about Veronica’s boundaries than mine, she’s taking the lead.
Veronica: We saw a couple on one of our swinging sites, she had a lovely smile and the big squishy variety breasts that I love. We send them an email and begin chatting. In the course of chatting Sandy mentions that her and her husband had changed their focus. They were looking more for a woman to join them, than for a couple to swap with. Normally, Hubman and I would say nice to meet you and call it a day, but we found ourselves intrigued. The idea of being a unicorn had been offered to me before, and I was mildly curious about it, and Hubman thought that it would be nice for me to have a couple to play with if he had any extended business trips.
Hubman: It’s probably pretty obvious that I’ve had numerous solo adventures since we opened our marriage, but Veronica has not, which was her choice. Plus, it seemed like John and Sandy weren’t exclusively looking for a single woman, that was just for now and I might get a chance to join in at some point.
Veronica: We agree to meet and Hubman and Sandy start texting and texting leads to naughty picture sharing and soon sexting, which leads Sandy to rethink the no couple stand.
Hubman: I had one condition with Veronica joining another couple without me- I wanted to meet them in person first. Over dinner or drinks somewhere would have been fine, I just wanted to meet the couple who wanted to fuck my wife while I was home with the kids.
Veronica: Between John and Hubman’s work travel schedule, it was proving challenging to set up a date, so I went over to Sandy’s house for an afternoon visit and hung out with her and her adorable babies. She is a SAHM and new to the area so she enjoyed having company, and I enjoyed hanging out with her and the kids. She explained her issue with couple swapping, apparently she and John had swapped with a couple where the man from the couple kept on trying to see Sandy without his wife and Sandy was uncomfortable with that. However, she felt that Hubman was both ‘freaky yet really sweet and normal’ and was interested in including him.
Hubman: Freaky yet really sweet and normal. I like the sound of that!
Veronica: The night finally came, after some Auntie Flo induced rescheduling (Hubman: Remember HNT Gag Order? Now you know the story behind that post). We get to their house after 9:30 when their kids are asleep and are led to their comfy basement. Soon kissing begins and clothing comes off and as always, my cupless bra is a big hit. Hubman takes a back seat and watches while Sandy, John and I become a flesh pile on the floor. I soon have John pumping at me from behind, while Sandy is licking my pussy like its the last one she will get to play with.
Veronica: Eventually, Hubman joins in, but I am still the focus of the evening. I play with Sandy, I play with John, I play with both of them, Hubman plays with Sandy, but soon, we are all exhausted and sweaty and it is time for us to go home and relieve the sitter.
Hubman: My play with Sandy didn’t include any fucking, just fooling around and her sucking my cock for a bit, I didn’t even get the chance to go down on her. We all wanted Veronica to remain the focus of the fun. I have to say, I enjoyed seeing her as the center of attention in a 3some it was pretty hot. And not just because John had a monster cock that had Veronica vocalizing her enjoyment quite loudly
Veronica: At the end it was a fun evening, but I won’t be unicorning any time soon. For me a big part of the fun is watching Hubman getting off and I would not be able to have that experience if he was not there.
Another date with Sandy and John but with Hubman more involved? Who knows…
Jan 032011
A couple of months ago I wrote the following, to accompany a Wanton Wednesday post-
There are many ways that Veronica and I share ourselves with friends and lovers
There is one thing I don’t share with anyone else, she wouldn’t have it any other way
If you looked carefully at the click-thru picture in that post, you might have noticed that Veronica and I were having anal sex. The message is that while we do a lot of things when we’re playing with other partners we, like just about anyone else, have our limits. A day or two after that post John and Ann, who are regular commenters on our lifestyle posts, e-mailed me-
If you and Veronica decide to bring back advice column part of your blog, I think that you could have a very interesting post about making decisions about what couples share with others and what they don’t. The underlying reasons are very interesting.
Well, since we did decide to bring back Swing Shift, what better way to start than with this suggestion?
Once upon a time, I convinced Veronica to try anal sex, she had never tried it with any of her previous partners and well, she was my first partner at all, so obviously I never tried it before either! As much as we’ve both come to enjoy it, as we were discussing limits with others, she told me that anal sex is something that she wants to save for just her and I, no one else gets her ass.
Veronica, care to explain your rationale?
I leave it as your sole domain because I wanted to have something of my body that I do not share with anyone but you because I like the concept of some physical exclusivity amongst the sharing. I do not limit you because if another woman wants to experience anal sex with you, I want you and her to have the freedom to do so. While I am sure many of the men I have had sex with would like to fuck my ass, I do not feel that my not participating in anal sex limits the fun we have together, as they still have my pussy and mouth at their disposal. I also think that you get a little kick out of knowing that there is a part of my body that no man (or woman with a strap on) can ever have.
Isn’t that sweet?
It’s not that simple though. She’s comfortable with my having anal sex with other women, plus she is interested in trying double penetration, which we mention on our swinger website profiles as a fantasy of hers.
In practice, these limits have not presented a problem- while I have had anal sex with several other women, only once was it during a full swap with another couple. If the topic of anal play comes up with another couple, we leave no room for misinterpretation and let them know of our boundaries.
Veronica: However a ‘boundary’ does not have to be limiting; it can also be an opportunity. For example, while I do not mind a little cum landing on my face in the course of Hubman cumming, I do not find the idea of a facial appealing (unless I am at a really nice spa and a mani-pedi is also involved). However in the course of our play with other couples or solo, if a woman asked Hubman to cum on her face, then he is free to do, I wouldn’t mind at all.
Because of the Wanton Wednesday post we’re using anal sex as an example, but it really applies to anything, kissing, fellatio, cunnilingus, soft swap vs full swap, whatever. Establish the limits you and your partner are comfortable with, share those limits with your other playmates as necessary, and have fun!
===========================================================
This is where we ask for feedback- do you have experiences you’d like to share? Disagree with anything that we’ve said? Have we overlooked anything that you’d like to point out? That’s what the comments section is for, so don’t be shy!!
Swing Shift started in June of 2009 in response to questions we received from readers interested in swinging and open relationships. When we started swinging we had on-line friends who were our mentors, helping us navigate the open waters. These posts are our way of paying it forward and sharing our lessons learned. If you have a topic suggestion or question for a future Swing Shift, contact me at hubman38@gmail.com and indicate if you’d prefer to remain anonymous or not. The full archives can be found here.
